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3/21/12

loose cannon.

I have a problem. Anybody can say they have anger issues but when it interferes with your job that's another type of anger willing to deal with the consequences. I have two jobs now, mind you, and I hate my second job the most. Let me get to the point, I am a loose cannon. I am easily set off and easily offended. I've never been this way its crazy! I remember when I used to be extremely passive & non-confrontational just wishing that I could be able to stand up for myself and tell a bitch off if necessary..but now it's like a switch that I can't turn off. Me and the general manager had an exchange of words today..and its like..I don't give a fuck who it is, and if I get fired or not. I am extremely unprofessional just because I do not give a fuck. Anyhow...we exchanged words and he's all like 'I don't have time for this', I guess he thought I had time for it huh? oh I'm sorry, I assume that when I checked my list of duties for the day I missed the part about dealing with bullshit. So he puts me in time out and he comes in after a few and we go in circles about the situation at hand and of course nothing gets resolved..at least in my point of view. Ugh. It's the same process when I was working at Starbucks..they just tolerated my shit for longer than I expected, until they let me go obviously. Call me crazy but I think it's kind of funny at this point. No, I'm not that immature but what can I do when people are constantly testing me? It brings me back to a bad place & plus, I feel that I don't deserve it and it all results in me lashing out...I am a friendly person. I am a nice person. But I am misunderstood...and that's one thing I can't escape..I don't ask people to respect me because they don't know me, but what I want is for people not to provoke me. I dont walk around starting shit. All I want is peace of mind.

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